The head of a company survived 9/11 because
His son started kindergarten.
Another fellow was alive because it was
His turn to bring donuts.
One woman was late because her
Alarm clock didn’t go off in time.
One was late because of being stuck on the NJ Turnpike
Because of an auto accident.
One of them
Missed his bus.
One spilled food on her clothes and had to take
Time to change.
Car wouldn’t start.
Get a taxi.
The one that struck me was the man
Who put on a new pair of shoes that morning,
Took the various means to get to work but before.
He got there, he developed a blister on his foot.
He stopped at a drugstore to buy a Band-Aid.
That is why he is alive today..
Now when I am
Stuck in traffic,
Miss an elevator,
Turn back to answer a ringing telephone…
All the little things that annoy me,
I think to myself,
This is exactly where
I’m meant to be
At this very moment
Have you ever read something that killed you inside?
Like a text message or someone’s status. Everything was going fine until you accidentally came across something you didn’t want to read. Or found out something you were better off not knowing. It’s almost as if it was posted just to purposely hurt you. But you constantly read it over and over again to torture yourself. It sucks how one little thing can ruin your whole day.
I knew that feeling I had was right. The only thing I needed was a confirmation. And guess what, it was true. Stupid me for falling for it again. It sucks telling myself, “oh, I’m used to it. I’m used to people fucking me over.” What can I do now? Nothing really, but try to move on. Yes, try. I’m such an idiot for falling for it again, I can’t express that enough. My mind was telling me not to do it, but my heart was telling me that there might be hope.
And it’s just like that. You’re perfectly fine at one moment and then all of a sudden, it hits you. The things you try to forget comes rushing into your mind at one time. Sometimes, you don’t even know how you feel because there’s so much thoughts running through your head at once. The feeling of regret, of not being good enough, the right love and the wrong time, the list goes on. When you push back memories far enough, you tend to forget about them for a while. But when they come rushing back, the feeling is overwhelming.
“You don’t ever really let go, though. You don’t stop. You don’t stop hurting, you don’t stop loving. It doesn’t go away, you just keep living and eventually things get pushed into the background of your life so it’s not consuming you every day. And then one day you know you’re okay. It still hurts, you still miss that person. And yeah, you forget the details. The way she smelled, the way her mouth tasted, how her skin felt, the sound of her voice. It’s almost like a different life, a different person that loved her, was with her. But on a day-to-day level, you know you’re okay. Sort of.”—Jasinda Wilder, Falling Into You (via moonsulk)